tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63171246538289811982024-02-18T18:24:48.545-08:00Divorce Mediation HelpsThis site provides readers with valuable information about divorce mediation.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-74354310546105613992010-07-10T11:32:00.000-07:002010-07-10T11:32:00.155-07:00Getting a Divorce in VA Tips<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal">If you plan on getting a divorce in VA, there are a few things you'll need to know about the process. By taking the time to learn what is needed, you can save yourself a lot of trouble down the road. Below, we'll discuss some tips for getting divorced in Virginia. <br />
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There are two types of divorce; contested and uncontested. If your divorce is contested, it means that your spouse does not want to get a divorce, and will most likely end up fighting you in court. If your divorce is uncontested, it means your spouse agrees and also wants to get divorced. In Virginia, with an uncontested divorce, you'll need an agreement of separation signed by both you and your spouse. <br />
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A permanent divorce in Virginia is called a "divorce <span class="highlightedsearchterm">a</span> v<span class="highlightedsearchterm">in</span>culo m<span class="highlightedsearchterm">a</span>trimonii," or 'from the bonds of marriage.' You'll need solid grounds to get the divorce, and in Virginia those grounds consist of adultery, felony conviction, cruelty, abandonment, or voluntary separation. For a voluntary separation, the time is six months with a written agreement and no children. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">If there are children, the time will be closer to a year. If the divorce is uncontested, this will go a lot more smoothly. Most of the time, the grounds for divorce is voluntary separation. With another type of grounds, you may be required to submit proof to the judge. For instance, with a felony conviction, court papers or arrest reports would most likely suffice. However, with grounds like adultery, the evidence may be a little trickier to obtain. Speaking with an attorney can help you in this area.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It's important to speak to a divorce attorney in Virginia to be sure that your rights are covered and that your best interests are being taken into consideration.</div><!--EndFragment-->Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-68055949647737714642010-06-30T12:00:00.000-07:002010-06-30T12:00:18.486-07:00What are Mediation and Arbitration Services?<!--StartFragment--> <br />
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If you're going through a legal battle, or foresee yourself going through a legal battle in the near future, arbitration or mediation services might help. Both of these options are often low-cost, sensible ways to solve conflicts and disputes without spending a ton of money or spending months in a court room. It's important to understand what these services are, in case you find yourself in need of them in the future. <br />
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<b> What is Mediation and Arbitration? </b><br />
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Rather than going into a court of law to battle out certain issues, you can choose to go through mediation or arbitration. This is what happens: a third-party or mediator will listen to both parties explain the situation and their desires. The mediator has been trained to diffuse situations and help both parties come to a sensible solution that will make both sides happy. This can keep tempers from running hot and can keep individuals from taking actions that they will regret. <br />
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<b> Benefits of Mediation and Arbitration Services</b><br />
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With mediation or arbitration, it's easy to save a lot of money because you don't need attorney services, even though some individuals choose to keep their attorneys. In addition, you'll often save a lot of money in court costs. Rather than having a long, drawn-out battle, you can get solutions sooner. With a calmer atmosphere, there’s no need to go through the stress and trauma that you may have to go through in a courtroom. This is beneficial to you, the other party, your family, and your health.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Many people use mediation or arbitration for divorce rather than dragging their families into a difficult court battle. Not only is there the potential to save a lot of money, but there is the potential to save a lot of time and heartache.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Mediation and arbitration are great alternatives to nasty legal battles.</div><!--EndFragment-->Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-86318519868839388492010-06-30T11:59:00.000-07:002010-06-30T11:59:01.138-07:00Using a Mediator for Divorce<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal">If you plan on getting a divorce, you might want to consider using the services of a mediator. By doing so, you can save yourself a lot of time and a lot of money. In addition, mediation often keeps situations calmer and much less stressful than traditional divorces in a courtroom. <br />
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<b> What is Mediation?</b> <br />
Rather than going to a regular courtroom and battling it out with attorneys, mediation takes place in a separate place with a third party. The third party, or mediator, will listen calmly to you and your spouse, and will work to keep the situation very calm. This helps you and your spouse come to an agreement that you will both appreciate. Mediation can often lead to compromise that is often not realized in a stressful court of law. <br />
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<b> Do You Need Attorneys?</b> <br />
You actually do not need attorneys with mediation. You get the chance to make your own decisions rather than allowing a judge to make those decisions for you. However, you do have the ability to retain your attorney if you prefer. Mediation is not about tricking you into things, but about helping you and your spouse come to compromises that really work. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b>How Long Does the Process Usually Take?</b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Many mediators recommend at least a few sessions that can last a couple of hours. This will give you the opportunity to discuss all issues at hand and make decisions based on you and your spouse’s desires. If custody issues and child support issues need to be discussed, it could take a little longer than this. However, it’s often worth it because there is much less stress involved.<br />
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Mediation can be a wonderful opportunity to part amicably rather than going through a nasty battle that can be traumatic and stressful.</div><!--EndFragment-->Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-71665640616573393002010-06-30T11:23:00.001-07:002010-06-30T11:23:08.707-07:00Can You Get an Online Divorce?<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal">In this day and age, individuals can do many things online - from purchasing a car to hiring an employee. IN fact, even things that would normally be a lot of trouble (such as divorce), can be done online. There are a few differences, though. Below, we'll discuss online divorces and how they work. <br />
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Online divorces are often much cheaper than hiring an attorney in your hometown and going to court. In fact, with some sites, you can get a divorce for just a few hundred dollars. This gives you the opportunity to save a lot of money with your divorce. Some websites require the divorce to be uncontested, so you need to research this before making up your mind. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Getting an online divorce does not mean that everything can be done from the comfort of your computer chair. Your spouse will most likely need to be served divorce papers, and there are forms that you will have to file with the court in your area. You may also need to discuss things like child support and custody issues with the judge or your spouse. Getting an attorney is recommended, although you don’t necessarily need one. Someone to fight in your corner (especially if your spouse has an attorney) is never a bad idea.<br />
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Usually, you'll give your information to the online staff and they'll fill out the forms you need in order to obtain your divorce. You'll file these forms at your local divorce court, and you'll appear before the judge in order to complete the divorce process. It's important to research any website that claims they can help you get a divorce before you choose one. By taking the time to research any site fully, you can be sure that you will have made the right decision.</div><!--EndFragment-->Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-57782777964853411512010-06-30T11:21:00.000-07:002010-06-30T11:21:01.035-07:00Alternative Dispute Resolution Tips<!--StartFragment--> <br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal">When you are facing a potential dispute, there are a hundred things running through your mind. How to protect yourself, what steps to take, and what you should know are just a few of the things you might be considering. You might even be prepared for a lengthy court battle just to get your point across. However, there are alternatives to spending weeks or possibly months in court. Below, you’ll get some great alternative dispute resolution tips. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b>Think with a Clear Head</b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Sometimes, it’s easy to get too close to the problem to really see how you can fix it. Take a little time out for yourself to get your head cleared and to think about a reasonable solution. For instance, if you’re being threatened with divorce, ask your spouse for some time to think. Rather than spending every minute worrying about what’s going to happen, take some time to do something that puts you at ease. This will allow you to escape the stress and frustration for a while so that when you come back to the problem, you have a clear head. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b>Mediation</b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Rather than hiring one of the most savvy attorneys in your area and digging your heels in for a rough court case, consider mediation. Especially with divorces, mediation is a huge benefit and a wonderful alternative to court. Not only can you spare yourself and your family the trauma and emotions of a nasty court battle, but you have the potential to save yourself a lot of money. In addition, you and the other party get to come to agreements that make both of you happy instead of relying on a judge you don’t know to make huge decisions about your life. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Mediation can be very beneficial, and since the atmosphere is usually much calmer than a court case, you won’t go through all the stress and trauma. In addition, mediators are trained to diffuse situations so that you and the other party can think clearly and come to reasonable compromises. You should know that attorneys aren’t necessarily required with mediation. Although many people decide to retain their personal attorneys, you can actually use mediation to keep from having to hire an attorney. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b>Talk to the Other Party</b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">After things have cooled off, spend some time trying to talk to the other party. No matter what the dispute is about, you should be able to look at it from their point of view. They should try to do the same, ideally. This can give you both the opportunity to come up with compromises that benefit you both – and can often prevent the need for a lengthy battle in the courtroom. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Disputes happen all over the place, and very often. However, if you spend some time really thinking about alternatives, the chances are that you can both walk away unharmed and without hard feelings. Considering the options above can allow you to do this and still be satisfied with the outcome of the dispute.</div><!--EndFragment-->Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-89016788295515322002010-03-09T04:23:00.000-08:002010-06-13T22:53:54.150-07:00Tips for Getting Past the Pain<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy5QzrISi9eUnULBHjXDIE53UHpf6rroZFqHfBWqeeGKsOV7t7wGFJ3YbvjPwpbi-gbu6Juv5u03jCYFBzVIKZFlXKW75kiNGjtTdY3OIik98QDYPBERZkDUSV8z3KvNJSx7QpQMbRM1U/s1600/photo_7964_20090827.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy5QzrISi9eUnULBHjXDIE53UHpf6rroZFqHfBWqeeGKsOV7t7wGFJ3YbvjPwpbi-gbu6Juv5u03jCYFBzVIKZFlXKW75kiNGjtTdY3OIik98QDYPBERZkDUSV8z3KvNJSx7QpQMbRM1U/s320/photo_7964_20090827.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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A divorce can be the most stressful event of your life. Long, drawn out divorce proceedings can take a toll on you physically, mentally, and emotionally. In addition you are experiencing feelings of hurt, anger, and betrayal; all while mourning the loss of your marriage. Many think that as soon as the divorce is finalized you can take a big sigh of relief and simply get on with your life. For any divorcee, they know that this is not as easy as it sounds. You need to treat yourself with care. You are grieving the loss of a marriage and a familiar way of life. Many divorcees have had the added stress of moving, finding a job, and adjusting to a new financial outlook. All of these factors are internalized and can negatively affect your body and mind.<br />
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Therefore, it is critical that you take steps to take care of yourself post divorce. Some of these may seem like obvious steps. However, they are often overlooked and ignored during this painful and stressful phase of your life. Follow the tips below to reclaim your body, mind, and spirit.<br />
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Tip #1 – Nurturing<br />
Every day, mark on your calendar time in your schedule for yourself to relax. This can mean a yoga class, time to meditate, a long bubble bath, flipping through a favorite magazine, or talking a long walk with your dog. Whatever activity helps you to feel calm and relaxed should be done daily.<br />
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Tip #2 – Listen to Your Needs<br />
Post divorce is the best time to speak up for yourself and get what you want. You are single, in control, and the maker of your own destiny. Don’t feel guilty for asking what you want, or receiving it.<br />
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Tip #3 – Routine is Refuge<br />
Going through a divorce can affect many other aspects and relationships in your life. This can be very disruptive and you can feel lost at sea. Sticking to a routine can help you reclaim some comfort and reliability in your life. <br />
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Tip #4 – Keep it Simple<br />
Post divorce is probably the worst time to make a major life changing decision. Embarking on a new career or business venture, or moving to another state can be overwhelming. You may think you are ready, but your emotions need to time to settle after going through a divorce.<br />
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Tip #5 – Avoid Crutches<br />
It is easy to turn to crutches to help you through the stressful and painful divorce process. Post divorce, it is important that you say no to these damaging habits. Avoid excess alcohol, drug use, or overeating as coping strategies. These are unhealthy habits and will only cause you different problems.<br />
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Tip #6 – Embrace your New Life<br />
Post divorce can be a very exciting time if you let it be. You have complete control. You do not need to consult a partner. Enjoy it! Take the dance class you have always wanted to, start a new hobby that sounds enticing, or join your local gym. Explore opportunities you have always wanted to but never found the time to. <br />
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A divorce is certainly a life changing event. But let it change your life for the better. Following the above tips will help you come out on the other side of your divorce a better person in a better place.<br />
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Photo: <a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Men_g118-Depression_p7964.html">Salvatore Vuono</a>Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-75806043275960204592010-03-09T04:22:00.001-08:002010-03-09T04:22:04.970-08:00Divorce Coping StrategiesWhen you first got married you probably never though the word “divorcee” would be used to describe you. Most of us get married under the assumption that we will spend the rest of our lives with the person beside us in the aisle. The reality is that things don’t always work out. People change, life happens, people grow apart. Sometimes, two people were never quite right for each other but they tried to make it work. Sometimes, one partner strays or gives up on the marriage. Whatever the circumstance, divorce happens. While divorce can be very hard emotionally and mentally, know that you will come out on the other side. Below are some tips on how to overcome divorce.<br />
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#1 – The Grieving Process<br />
It is important to understand the end of a marriage can feel like the death of a relationship and should be treated as such. Regardless of the circumstances of your divorce, recognize that you do need to time to grieve the loss of your marriage. The grieving time needed will vary from person to person. Only you know when it is appropriate to put your marriage and divorce behind you and move on. That means that your healing has begun. <br />
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#2 - Acceptance<br />
No, your marriage did not work out. You could not hold onto and force it to work. Many emotions are expended in trying to “go back” in time and make a failed marriage work. One of the best ways to overcome a divorce is to accept it. Accept that your marriage did not work out and there is nothing you can do about it. Do not place blame on your spouse, or blame yourself. The simple act of acceptance will help you cope with a divorce.<br />
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#3 – Don’t Neglect You<br />
A divorce proceeding and settlement can be drawn out and fraught with an array of emotions and stress. During this process, it is important to not neglect yourself. Stay healthy in your eating habits and continue to exercise. Stay healthy mentally by meditating, reading a good book, or enjoying time with friends and family. Indulge yourself and your body and make yourself your top priority.<br />
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#4 – This is Not a Pity Party<br />
During a divorce it is easy to be overcome by feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, guilt, and embarrassment. But a divorce is not a pity party and don’t let it become one. Keep a positive outlook on life and remember that good things lay ahead for you.<br />
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#5 – Add the Fun Back In<br />
A great way to overcoming divorce is to add the fun back into your life. For months or even years you have been on an emotional rollercoaster – which is no fun at all. Relax, let your hair down, and have some fun. Join a dance class, take a girls trip, or try a new hobby. There has never been a better time in your life to re-invent yourself. Why not have fun doing it?<br />
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#6 – Don’t be Afraid to Seek Help<br />
If you are having a tough time emotionally after your divorce, acknowledge that you don’t have to do everything on your own and help is available. Seek professional help from a therapist or counselor that specializes in divorce.<br />
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All of these tips will help you overcome your divorce and move on with your new life!Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-47920979233953386922010-03-09T04:20:00.000-08:002010-03-09T04:20:26.728-08:00What to Do if You're DepressedGoing through a divorce can be harrowing. The emotional, financial and mental stress alone can make the entire divorce process harder. Many think that once the judge has signed the final divorce papers, things will get easier. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. Experiencing depression after a divorce is a common occurrence. But there is help available to you.<br />
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The entire separation and divorce process can be a very trying time emotionally. You may experience everything from anger, guilt, hurt, betrayal, and disbelief. Depending on the circumstances surrounding your divorce these emotions can vary. Not everyone has time to sort through these emotions during the divorce proceedings. And once a divorce is finalized, the mourning period for your marriage may begin, as well as uncertainty about what your future holds.<br />
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If you are an emotionally and mentally strong person, the healing process will be easier. In fact it may begin right after the divorce is finalized. You may be eager to put this part of your life to rest and see what possibilities await you. You may have divorced yourself emotionally from your marriage long ago. But not everyone experiences this easy transition.<br />
If you have just finalized your divorce and find yourself unwilling to accept the end of your marriage you may be suffering from depression. You may feel stuck in your life and have no idea where to go and who to turn to. Regardless of the circumstances of your divorce you should not feel embarrassed about these emotions. Seeking the help of a qualified therapist or counselor can provide you the relief you need.<br />
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With today’s resources you can find exactly the type of therapy that fits your needs, budget, and your lifestyle. Perhaps you only need a session or two of life coaching. Or your feelings may be deeper and you may need extended counseling on relationships and yourself as a person. You can find a therapist to help you with your specific issues. Whatever your needs, know that help is available to you. You just have to know where to look.<br />
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You can seek out the services of an individual therapist or counselor. These can be found in the phone book, or a referral from your general practitioner. If the idea of one-on-one counseling does not appeal to you, consider finding a support group. A local church or synagogue may already sponsor a group for surviving divorce. Local community organizations are also great resources in locating support groups. Support groups are usually much less expensive than one-on-one counseling, although you should contact your health insurance company to see what coverage you have. Some therapists do offer sliding scales based upon your ability to pay.<br />
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For many divorcees feelings of shame, guilt, and depression are common. There is no reason you should live with these feelings or feel shame in seeking treatment. This is your opportunity to seize control over your life and your emotions. This is part of the new journey you are embarking on after your divorce. Embrace it, do not fear it.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-38880513951695255962010-03-09T04:17:00.001-08:002010-03-09T04:17:54.079-08:00Tips for Getting Your Finances in OrderIf you are going through a divorce or beginning to start the proceedings you may have overlooked all the financial details of a marriage and divorce. But the financial details will not go away and a divorce can only muddy the waters. A large portion of divorce proceedings focuses on dividing assets and finances. Protect yourself so you get your fair share. Below are ten financial steps everyone should take when going through a divorce.<br />
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#1 – Get a copy of your credit report<br />
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You should request a copy of your credit report from all three credit reporting agencies: Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion. This will succinctly show you all outstanding debts, balances, and payments being held in your name. Remember that it is possible your spouse has opened an account with your name on it without your knowledge. These credit reports will give you a clear financial picture of where you stand.<br />
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#2 – Open your own accounts<br />
It is important to open up accounts in your name only before the divorce proceedings start. This makes it easier to do so. You should open up your own checking account, savings account and brokerage accounts. Apply for a credit card held in your name only.<br />
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#3 – Close the joint accounts<br />
Divorces can take several months or more. During this time you can protect yourself from future financial liabilities by closing all joint accounts such as bank accounts and credit cards. Do so in writing and keep a copy for your records. Ask the bank to report the account as “closed by the customer” so it will not negatively report on your credit report.<br />
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#4 – Keep your assets in your name<br />
You will have assets that you owned before you got married that are in your name. This can include your vehicle, real estate, inheritance, gifts, etc. Make sure you keep these assets separately. If you transfer them into joint accounts you may lose them.<br />
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#5 – Should you sell the house?<br />
In past years, most women tried to keep the family home above all else. They would get blind to what they might be giving up to keep the house. It is more prudent to consider selling the family home. You can then divide the proceeds according to the divorce terms, often without paying any capital gains on the sale of the home.<br />
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#6 – Update your beneficiary<br />
It is imperative that you individually change the beneficiary on any insurance policy, your will, trusts, pension plans, etc. The divorce will not do this for you. You will need to contact each company, delete your spouse’s name, and change the beneficiary in writing. You may even want to change coverage amounts while you are updating policies.<br />
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#7 – Get your name back<br />
You are divorcing him, why keep his name? You can reclaim your maiden name by showing your divorce document to the proper agencies. This would include your driver’s license, passport, and social security number. You can then begin changing your name at doctor’s offices, insurance policies, schools, etc. You will also need to fill out a new W-4 or other proper tax form so your new name is recorded properly with the IRS.<br />
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#8 – Social Security<br />
If you are of social security age, 62 currently, or close, you should contact the Social Security Administration. If you are 62 and have been married for a minimum of 10 years and have not remarried you may qualify for benefits based upon your ex-spouses record. This can apply even if he has not applied for benefits. This can also apply in cases of raising a child younger than 16.<br />
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#9 – Health insurance<br />
If you were covered medically under your spouse’s insurance you can COBRA your insurance under the same plan for up to 18 months. This can help buy you time until you find your own health insurance coverage.<br />
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#10 – Get advice<br />
Whether you will be receiving monthly alimony or one lump sum payment, you should seek advice from a financial planner or accountant. They can help you form a financial plan and budget to successfully live your new life!<br />
All of these tips will help you live through the financial burden a divorce can be. Follow them and you can still come out ahead.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-51845717459977374632010-03-09T04:16:00.001-08:002010-03-09T04:16:40.191-08:00Divorce Tips for WomenIf you are a woman considering divorce, you should make some preparations before actually filing the papers. By preparing yourself and taking a few proactive steps, the entire divorce proceedings will run much more smoothly. Divorces have many caveats and are fraught with misstep, but there are things you can do to protect yourself. Below are some tips for any woman to follow if they are considering filing for divorce.<br />
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Tip #1 – Paperwork<br />
If you are considering filing for divorce it is essential to gather up all of your paperwork first. Some women already have a copy of everything or currently maintain the household paperwork. Others have had no part of the running of the household. Whatever your situation, you need to find the following documents and make a copy of them for your records; bank account statements, credit card statements, investment statements, retirement account statements, mortgage statements, and tax returns for the previous three years. It is a good idea to have documentation of any other assets or debts you each have individually or in both your names.<br />
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Tip #2 – Finances<br />
Before beginning the divorce process, it is important to know where you stand financially. You can do this by running a simple asset and debt comparison. This will list the assets held by your and your spouse against any debts outstanding by you and your spouse. Assets would include equity in your real estate holdings, investment accounts, and savings accounts. Your can then deduct the total amount of your debts from the total amount of your assets for a clear view of where you stand financially. This net worth is the true picture of what is actually divided in a divorce proceeding.<br />
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Tip #3 – Find a Lawyer<br />
It is also essential to begin your search for an attorney to represent you throughout the divorce proceedings. A divorce attorney can also help guide you during these first stages of the divorce process. They can give advice, resources, and provide you with your options throughout the process. Many women wait until their spouse has already hired a divorce attorney, but then you are already at a disadvantage.<br />
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Tip #4 – The IRS<br />
Prior to filing for divorce, and throughout the proceedings, it is important that you remain current on your taxes. This would include any outstanding filing that needs to be done, or any estimated payments or tax installment payments that need to be made. The IRS can hold up the entire divorce process if you fall behind. If you suspect your spouse is not filing the taxes properly you can file an amended return as a married person who is filing separately from their spouse. Your accountant and divorce attorney can help you with these details.<br />
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Tip #5 – Insurance<br />
Insurance is often overlooked during the beginning stages of a divorce. You should gather up information on your health insurance, life insurance, vehicle, and any disability insurance you may have. These policies are probably held jointly with your spouse, and spouses are often listed as beneficiaries. Prior to filing for a divorce you should change over your policies to your name and update beneficiary information. <br />
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Having all of the details in place prior to filing for divorce will make the entire process smoother. Unpleasant surprises will be much less likely to crop up in regards to these financial matters. This will also give you more time to devote to your emotional and mental health during the proceedings. If you have children this will also free up your time to devote the time needed to help them through the divorce process. Preparing yourself will make it easier to complete an amicable divorce.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-33967118413496383832008-04-07T17:47:00.000-07:002010-06-13T22:57:37.598-07:00Divorce Mediation Counseling<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsZOU6PLqUjoDPReI3VWdFla3Gq19EkXamAiY3nqPy0Z9notsaySt-mx_jfQxeDv-dSyBI5h-nGNv4uW2_aqKl3qX-jVb79CyZ03Bb3F6Tb_1bl2NUnIpJQwaCy6kF2pOFtfWZy8n3Vzw/s1600/photo_14978_20100419.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsZOU6PLqUjoDPReI3VWdFla3Gq19EkXamAiY3nqPy0Z9notsaySt-mx_jfQxeDv-dSyBI5h-nGNv4uW2_aqKl3qX-jVb79CyZ03Bb3F6Tb_1bl2NUnIpJQwaCy6kF2pOFtfWZy8n3Vzw/s320/photo_14978_20100419.jpg" /></a></div>A divorce is undoubtedly a life changing experience that's usually not the easiest of times for most people, particularly when there are many important issues to agree upon, such as co-parenting or deciding what to do with the family home. Stress levels are running high and all too often, emotions dictate how the marriage will come to an end, either as amicably as possible, keeping both spouses best interests in mind, or as an adversarial and lengthy power struggle.<br />
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<b>Some of the key points of divorce mediation include:</b><br />
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- The division of marital property and shared assets.<br />
- Resolving matters of spousal support.<br />
- Making decisions regarding child support.<br />
- Deciding on shared parenting arrangements and schedules.<br />
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Making each and every phase of the entire divorce mediation counseling process work for you is entirely possible, regardless of your situation or how complex you think the issues may be. Once couples realize and accept that the whole purpose of mediating is so they will both be able to come to mutual resolutions about their divorce, the expertise of the mediator will then keep each phase progressing smoothly.<br />
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To fully take advantage of the divorce mediation process, keep the following important points in mind:<br />
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The first session of mediation will be extremely crucial as all of the ground rules will be set, with the mediator outlining what you should expect from the process, and also, what will be expected of you.<br />
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Mediation will help to minimize the likelihood of any problems after the divorce is final, although future disagreements may also be resolved with a mediator rather than a court dispute. While mediators do not work for free, the rates are substantially lower than paying for two lawyers to handle the divorce.<br />
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For couples with children, entering into mediation is an excellent way to figure out workable co-parenting arrangements, utilizing the knowledge and experience of the mediator who doesn't have a vested interest in the children, other than ensuring that their best interests are met first. Even parents who want to do the right thing often have a hard time communicating with one another through litigation, whereas mediating allows both spouses to be heard while also having the advice of a neutral party.<br />
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The average divorce mediation takes anywhere from two to 10 sessions from start to finish, while the average litigated divorce is generally a year in length, and in some cases, two or three years, or longer, of emotionally draining court proceedings.<br />
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Any issues that absolutely cannot be agreed upon during mediation can be left to the court to decide, or for the couple's attorneys to negotiate. Also, either party always has the option of ending the mediation at any time, and instead, opting to litigate their disputes in the courtroom.<br />
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The positive setting that mediation provides, along with the unbiased counseling and suggestions given are largely the reason an estimated 90% of all couples are able to reach an agreement without litigating the terms of their divorce in court. That, coupled with the fact that mediation is designed to focus solely on the future rather than on past wrongs, or placing blame for the demise of the marriage, are what makes the process so highly successful.<br />
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Photo: <a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Men_g118-Big_Woman_And_Little_Man_p14978.html">djcodrin</a>Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-43178698472533701002008-04-05T07:31:00.000-07:002008-04-14T11:13:27.135-07:00Divorce Mediation in ArizonaAs in any state, the court system is the only entity legally able to end a marriage in Arizona, although divorcing spouses are encouraged and free to decide the terms of their divorce, if they are able to do so without litigating. Divorce mediation in Arizona is gaining in popularity as more and more couples discover the numerous benefits to avoiding litigation and settling their divorce with the guidance of a trained mediator.<br /><br />In Arizona, the court in each separate county hold its own set of individual requirements for mediators as there are no statewide guidelines to follow for one to practice mediation. However, all of the courts throughout the state do require that at least 40 hours of basic mediation training must be completed, in addition to extra training that focuses on family matters for those who plan on mediating divorce cases.<br /><br />The process of mediation encourages collaboration using the mediator as a neutral "buffer" to couples who wish to end their marriage without a heated courtroom battle, or simply without the need for two attorneys litigating their case. Divorce mediation in Arizona is designed to help couples make decisions about issues such as parenting time, which until recently has been referred to as "visitation," child support, spousal support or alimony, the division of property, assets, and other financial matters.<br /><br /><strong>Here is a list of courts by county in the state of Arizona:</strong><br /><br />- Apache<br />- Cochise<br />- Coconino<br />- Gila<br />- Graham<br />- Greenlee<br />- La Paz<br />- Maricopa<br />- Mohave<br />- Navajo<br />- Pima<br />- Pinal<br />- Santa Cruz<br />- Yavapai<br />- Yuma<br /><br /><strong>Arizona Divorce Laws</strong><br /><br />The law in Arizona states that only the Supreme Court may grant a divorce, which is actually referred to a "dissolution of marriage," with the initial divorce proceedings being filed in the person's county of residence by either spouse. Rather than the divorce being "awarded" to one spouse or another, a divorce decree in Arizona ends and legally changes the status of the marriage.<br /><br />The grounds for "divorce" in the state of Arizona are in most cases that neither spouse has to prove blame or state that the other is responsible for the end of the marriage, unlike in some other states. What must be proven, however, is that the marriage is irretrievably broken with no chance of a resolution between the spouses.<br /><br />If your marriage is considered to be a "covenant marriage," under the state law in Arizona blame must be established, such as proving the existence of adultery, physical, mental, or substance abuse, or abandonment. A knowledgeable mediator will be familiar with this optional type of marriage, which as of now, is only available in two other states besides Arizona - Louisiana and Arkansas. A covenant marriage carries stricter requirements from the usually type of marital union such as premarital counseling and giving up the option for a no-fault divorce.<br /><br /><strong>Finding an Experienced Divorce Mediator in Arizona</strong><br /><br />The State Bar Association of Arizona will have many resources and be able to guide one toward finding an experienced mediator, the majority of which will be attorneys by profession, although many are counselors, therapists, social workers, and financial experts. There are also several organizations in place to give residents of Arizona free or low cost legal assistance for those who need it, and the internet is a wealth of information regarding the process of mediation and finding one in your particular area.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-15106666966523662722008-04-05T07:29:00.000-07:002008-04-07T17:37:23.458-07:00The Truth About Divorce MediationMediation is a beneficial process in which a third, neutral party helps couples settle the issues and terms of their divorce without the need for lengthy and expensive litigation in court. Mediators are often attorneys by profession, although social workers, counselors, and even accountants may serve as a mediator provided they have the required training and knowledge.<br /><br />A divorce mediator typically wears many hats and is able to deftly tackle a multitude of tasks, such as explaining the various divorce and custody laws, facilitating discussions, and redirecting disagreements to focus on reaching an acceptable agreement. Mediators also gather and prepare important documents, filing them with the court when applicable.<br /><br /><strong>The 6 Steps to Divorce Mediation<br /></strong><br /><strong>The Introductory Remarks:</strong> The divorce mediation process begins with the mediator making opening remarks which outline the expected roles of both parties, defines the protocol to be followed, and gives an estimated time frame for the mediation. If each party has their attorney present, the mediator will usually set forth guidelines such as that the lawyers are free to confer, but each spouse must speak for themselves. The mediator will also speak briefly about the process of mediation and any applicable laws in the area.<br /><br /><strong>Statements by Both Parties: </strong>Both parties now have the opportunity to speak uninterrupted to make their side of the story known, and in most cases, the spouse who initiated the mediation will proceed first. If the attorneys make opening statements, the mediator will request that the clients each also make one as well. During this step of the process, the couple isn't necessarily expected to give a laundry list of facts, but rather is used as a way of gauging both of their emotional states and frames of mind.<br /><br /><strong>The Gathering of Information:</strong> This next step of mediation is used to expand on the opening statements and allows the mediator to ask open-ended questions that are designed to facilitate the process. Mediators often use this time to summarize, repeating back the main points in order to ensure both clients are in agreeance thus far.<br /><br /><strong>Identifying Problem Areas:</strong> This next portion of mediation may actually already have been accomplished during the previous steps, also, the mediator will also use this time to decide which issues should be settled first, and which are better left for last.<br /><br /><strong>Bargaining and Exploring Options:</strong> Different mediators may have varying styles of conducting this extremely integral step of the divorce mediation process. Some of the methods used may include developing plausible options, exploring hypothetical situations and proposals, and allowing the couple to each take turns being heard.<br /><br /><strong>Reaching an Agreement:</strong> After the key aspects of the divorce are resolved, or nearing that point, a final "brainstorming" session is conducted to iron out any extraneous details, ideally leading to reaching the final agreements on every single issue.<br /><br />According to the American Arbitration Association, over 85% of all divorces handled using mediation were able to reach a settlement, even when previous attempts through litigation had been unsuccessful. With such high success rates and the ability to save substantial amounts of money for both parties, it makes perfect sense for all couples facing divorce, regardless of the complexity of the issues at hand, to thoroughly explore their options with mediation.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-78880682827143438932008-04-05T07:27:00.000-07:002008-04-14T11:14:07.827-07:00Choosing a Divorce Mediation Service<div><br /><br />Well trained, professional mediators are in high demand as divorce rates continue to soar. Thankfully, choosing a divorce mediation service is a relatively simple task during a rather difficult and emotional time, as even in the very best of circumstances, divorce is still an uncomfortable process at best.<br /><br /><strong>The Role of the Divorce Mediator</strong><br /><br />The main role of a divorce mediator is to help a divorcing couple come to mutually agreed upon decisions regarding the dissolution of their marriage without the need for litigating in court with two separate attorneys and a judge making the ultimate ruling. Any mediator you choose should be well versed in the laws in your state as well as in the various legal documents that are required for the divorce process, and also have ample related experience.<br /><br /><strong>What to Look For</strong><br /><br />Although it isn't a requirement that a divorce mediator first be an attorney by profession, many people feel that since divorce is undoubtedly a legal issue, a lawyer possesses the vast knowledge and experience needed to handle a myriad of cases as opposed to a counselor or other similar professional. Likewise, choosing a divorce mediation service is something that's also a matter of personal opinion. It's important for both parties to feel at ease during the mediation process, therefore a certain degree of chemistry and comfort should be present for the best results.<br /><br />In addition to attorneys, social workers, counselors, psychologists, and marriage and family therapists may all be trained in mediation and duly qualified to successfully handle matters of divorce.<br /><br /><strong>Questions to Ask</strong><br /><br />Divorce mediators actually expect to be asked several questions from potential clients, so don't ever be hesitant about finding out the answers to all of your concerns when choosing a divorce mediation service. Not only does it simply make sense to thoroughly research prospective mediators, just as you would with any other important service or company that you do business with, but it's also more than worth the time it takes due to the substantial savings from avoiding a lengthy court litigation.<br /><br />Remember the following six questions if you need to utilize the services of a professional divorce mediator:<br /><br />1. For how many years has the service been in business, and more specifically, how long has the prospective mediator in your case been mediating divorces? - Obviously, the longer a mediator has been handling divorce cases, the more experience they will have.<br /><br />2. What is the mediator's level of training? - A mediator should have at least 40 hours of formal training at the minimum.<br /><br />3. Are there references available? - Mediation is completely confidential, so speaking with past clients may not be possible, however, most mediators have references in the form of colleagues and other professionals who are able to vouch for them.<br /><br />4. What is the mediator's general style? - Although mediation styles do vary, there is no one right or wrong method, but rather a matter of personal preference that generally depends on the situation.<br /><br />5. What are the fees, and how will they expected to be paid? - Fees vary widely from one region to the next, some mediators charge a flat fee while others will expect payment for each separation session. Be sure to find out this important information in advance.<br /><br />6. Does the service offer any informational materials? - Brochures, articles, and guidelines outlining relevant legal issues are helpful and also show that the mediators are well trained, well prepared, and interesting in informing and empowering their clients to get through their divorce as quickly and smoothly as possible.<br /> </div>Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-42038498240897440802008-04-03T07:00:00.000-07:002008-06-27T07:04:14.232-07:00Mediation and Litigation - Understanding the Financial Differences between the TwoIn case you didn’t know, it is extremely important to know the specific laws in your area and the various documents that will be required if you are preparing for divorce. In addition, you may find that it is not economically feasible for you to choose a divorce attorney to dissolve a marriage. In fact, you may find that hiring a divorce attorney to represent you would be the absolute worst ideas for you. Here’s why:<br /><br />All too often, divorce attorneys will use the term “dispute resolution” differently than most of us do. A perfect case in point, I recently spoke with a well-known and high-priced divorce attorney and asked her, “How do you decide which cases to accept?” <br /><br />She replied, “It all depends on the assets involved in the case.” When I probed further and asked what she meant by that, she said, “I don’t ever take a case unless there’s a half-million dollars in assets involved. Then, I can tell you exactly who’s going to get those assets.”<br /><br />I wondered aloud how she could possibly tell in advance who was going to get the assets in such a case, and she told me, “If there’s $500,000 in assets, I’ll get $125,000, the other attorney will get $125,000, and the parties will split the remaining $250,000.” <br /><br />So of course I asked how could she predict that so completely when she answered, “Don’t you understand? All I have to do is get the fight going, and that’s how it will end up.”<br /><br />As you can clearly see, using an attorney isn't always the best choice for every situation, especially in situations where there aren’t a lot of assets.<br /><br />In fact, the financial differences between handling your own divorce, hiring an attorney, or hiring a divorce mediator can be substantial. In most every single instance, a mediator will be able to guide the couple toward a favorable agreement with the lowest total cost for both parties.<br /><br />Plus, the rates and fees of all legal professionals may vary, often the retainer alone for two attorneys is comparable to a few sessions with a mediator, and depending on the complexity of your case, may be all that's really necessary.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-48341655104777972932008-04-02T06:59:00.000-07:002008-06-27T07:06:55.560-07:00Divorce Mediation OverviewSimply put, divorce mediation is an alternative to litigating the terms of a divorce in court. Through meetings referred to as caucuses, the couple and the mediator, as well as the couple's attorneys if they so choose, each aspect of the divorce is thoroughly discussed in order to reach an agreement both parties are satisfied with.<br /><br />Currently, there is no one governing body or entity that rules mediators, however, there are requirements set forth by each state or court that one must meet in order to be legally able to mediate a divorce and be listed in their respective court system.<br /><br />Mediators are skilled professionals such as attorneys, counselors, social workers, therapists, and accountants or financial advisors. Here are just some of the subjects and issues that divorce mediators are typically trained in:<br /><br />- Custody and child support issues<br />- Domestic abuse<br />- Effective mediating techniques<br />- Financial concerns, including taxes, pensions, and the division of property and assets<br />- Other parenting concerns<br />- Spousal support<br /><br /><strong>The 7 Key Components to Every Successful Divorce Mediation</strong><br /><br /><strong>Choices:</strong> One of the primary benefits of divorce mediation is that it offers the chance for exploring different choices, including many that haven't been thought of by either client.<br /><br /><strong>Collaboration:</strong> Another benefit of mediation is the fact that it gives both parties the ability to work together to reach a mutual agreement, as opposed to giving the ultimate power to a judge, who would normally make a ruling on the various aspects of the divorce settlement, such as child custody and support issues.<br /><br /><strong>Comfort:</strong> Both parties should be comfortable with the mediator and the process of mediation itself, which is completely voluntary in all circumstances. If at any time during the mediation either party wants to stop and instead litigate in court, they always have the option to do so.<br /><br /><strong>Confidentiality:</strong> The extent of confidentiality of the mediation should be outlined in detail at the start of the process. Anything discussed in mediation or any written materials related to the process are not admissible in any contested or subsequent court hearings, except for the final signed mediation agreement, unless otherwise agreed to prior to starting the process.<br /><br /><strong>Impartiality:</strong> Mediators have a duty and an ethical obligation to be impartial to both parties and are trained at maintaining neutrality and conveying that very fact to their clients. A mediator does not favor one spouse over another, nor do they have any vested interest in the outcome of the divorce other than that the terms are acceptable by both clients. The role of the mediator also extends to ensuring that divorcing couples voluntarily reach an agreement without any coercion from the other party or their respective attorneys.<br /><br /><strong>Information:</strong> The sheer value of mediation in terms of the legal advice and information that's gained is often worth the process, even without all of the other benefits. And, while this expert advice is invaluable, it isn't intended to replace the control over the end terms of the divorce, which remains firmly in the hands of both clients, and further counsel by attorneys is always encouraged if necessary.<br /><br /><strong>Satisfaction:</strong> Client satisfaction through a viable and mutually agreed upon settlement is the ultimate goal of the divorce mediation process.Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317124653828981198.post-84482957001898681472008-04-01T06:41:00.000-07:002010-06-13T23:00:47.489-07:00A Guide to Divorce Mediation Training<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvh8BPdrPzgOjB01T8QIRwEOSSM2cibSx3SBDlJ-CaaWu6PYSPJ2_D4cUp-o75ssgQUW1SZBImReJCH1d8DTDaRs7SZUlLh2lNfPMt1oaruTtZm2YxVFnAWLu87I8sT-w1A6-QqCWr9Y/s1600/photo_15906_20100501.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvh8BPdrPzgOjB01T8QIRwEOSSM2cibSx3SBDlJ-CaaWu6PYSPJ2_D4cUp-o75ssgQUW1SZBImReJCH1d8DTDaRs7SZUlLh2lNfPMt1oaruTtZm2YxVFnAWLu87I8sT-w1A6-QqCWr9Y/s320/photo_15906_20100501.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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<b>Divorce Mediation Legal Guidelines<br />
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In the United States, there is currently no one nationwide licensing agency or organization that governs the actual certification of mediators, although, the Academy of Family Mediators does have a set standard for the profession, which is 60 hours of basic training in order to be considered a "mediator."<br />
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Across the country, each individual state has their own set of training requirements, generally 40 to 60 hours of training, that must be met in order for one to mediate in a court of law and be listed on the court's rosters. Additionally, the qualifications to serve as a domestic relations mediator will also vary depending upon your state of residence. In the state of Michigan, for example, in order to legally serve as a divorce mediator, applicants must either be a licensed:<br />
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- Attorney<br />
- Psychologist<br />
- Counselor<br />
- Marriage and family therapist<br />
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Or, hold a master's degree in:<br />
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- Social work<br />
- Counseling<br />
- Marriage and family therapy<br />
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Or, hold a graduate's degree in behavioral science, or have five years experience in matters of family counseling. Also in this state, mediators must also then obtain eight additional hours of advanced training during every two year period in order to stay abreast of the current laws.<br />
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<b>The Different Types of Divorce Mediation Training</b><br />
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- Advanced Courses: Advanced workshops and seminars are designed for the mediator who needs to brush up on their skills, learn new laws, discover different styles of mediation, and delve deeper into issues such as financial topics, domestic violence, and learning how to handle difficult cases.<br />
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- Basic Courses: Basic divorce mediation courses are usually 40 to 60 hours long divided over a period of five to seven days on average and cover issues such as custody, child and spousal support, and the applicable divorce laws in your area.<br />
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- Computer-Based Courses: Done via the internet, this type of course is self-paced and usually includes instructional aids such as CDs, downloads, web forums, testing, and email support.<br />
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- Webinars: For law firms and organizations interested in group mediation training, especially refresher courses, there are several training institutions that offer webinars, where entire groups of people can learn together without ever leaving their workplace or office.<br />
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<b>Sample 6-Day Divorce Mediation Training Course</b><br />
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Day 1<br />
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- Introducing and explaining mediation to clients.<br />
- Adopting an air of neutrality and conveying it to clients.<br />
- Building rapport and trust.<br />
- Identifying client's goals and maintaining focus.<br />
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Day 2<br />
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- Learning the art of respectful listening.<br />
- Reviewing client's financial information.<br />
- Finding ways of increasing a client's options.<br />
- Learning legal issues such as grounds for divorce, division of assets, spousal maintenance.<br />
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Day 3<br />
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- Setting agendas and following them.<br />
- Creating viable parenting plans.<br />
- Knowing how to gauge client's underlying interests and goals.<br />
- Learning to control personal bias.<br />
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Day 4<br />
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- Learning to deal with different personality types.<br />
- Discovering ways of empowering the weaker client.<br />
- Perfecting the art of rewording a client's demands.<br />
- Recognizing signs of domestic violence or abuse.<br />
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Day 5<br />
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- Learning how to take back control of a heated discussion.<br />
- Learning the importance of consulting outside experts when necessary.<br />
- How to draft a mediation agreement.<br />
- Preparing clients for court.<br />
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Day 6<br />
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- Learning how to deal with combative couples.<br />
- How to develop a marketing plan and set up practice.<br />
- Preparing for your first client.<br />
- Receiving your certificate and course materials.<br />
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Photo: <a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Illustrations_g173-Support_p15906.html">Renjith Krishnan</a>Kristihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04914315673633616020noreply@blogger.com0